Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Part 3: My dress search, a story in many parts

After I got over the Pnina dress, I started looking at more streamlined, beach-wearable gowns. And, there wasn't anything wrong with any of them, but at no point did I feel "it".







The third one is just the second one with a piece of fabric on my arm showing me what it would look like with a little sleeve because I remain unconvinced (despite the Pnina dress) that the strapless look is for me. My #1 body obsession, frankly my only body obsession, is that I hate my arms. And I know a little sleeve won't do much but I think it will just make me feel slightly better.

My favorite of the "fine but not it" bunch of dresses was this one at Pronovias:





It's a nice dress, and I think it looks good on me, but it was in the $2k range which, while I recognize is the bottom of wedding gown ranges, just seemed like too much for a dress that A)doesn't look it and B)doesn't make my heart go pitter-patter. It's a very nice gown, and I understand the wedding industrial complex says that everything must be ridiculously priced in order for two people to swear their love and commitment to each other, but I feel like I've tried on similar dresses over the years and they were like $250, though of course without the train.

So, where am I now? I think we're going to move ahead with an April 5th wedding date, which limits my gown options. I'm actually happy about that. If I focus on samples and previously worn dresses I won't spend a sum of money that I find absurd on a dress. Again, I get that 2k is "cheap" for wedding dresses but 2k is a vacation and I'd rather spend that money to lay on a beach somewhere with IC than on a dress I'll wear just the once. And I have a back-up plan just in case I find myself in March without a dress. I've seen a dress that will work, that fits me, and that's pretty great, good enough that I won't post a photo of it here in case it ends up being my wedding dress. I still hope to see something that will make me gasp an audible "wow" or get the feeling that this dress must be my dress. But if it doesn't happen, that's ok. I've got a groom that I feel must be my groom and all I ultimately care about is making a life with him.

11 comments:

  1. I like the suggestion of cap sleeve in photo #3 and think that would be a good look on you. FWIW.

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  2. Yeah, it's fine, but only fine and just not doing it for me.

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  3. I was in a short film several years ago, and the director rented me a wedding dress from the Sony Prop House in LA that was a. maze. ing. And I think it was less than $100 for a couple days.

    I had completely forgotten that until just now. Are you thinking you'll want to keep your dress forever? Or would that maybe be an option if you didn't find the perfect one? (Since you also live in Entertainmentland.)

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  4. That is SUCH a great idea! I looked into renting a dress but it really isn't an option in NY for some reason but a Prop House would definitely rent to me! And, no, I don't care about keeping it forever at all. Thank you, I'll look into it.

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  5. The first dress looks amazing! If your backup is even better than that one, I'd say you're in a good place.

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  6. The last dress is sooooo pretty! It's my favorite of all the pics you posted.

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  7. The last dress is really lovely on you, no question. I like the first one too, something about the fabric(may be just the lighting) suits you. You can definitely pull off fitted/strapless but you should feel comfortable too. You're right not to force it, you have time (the backup dress is such a tease, email me the pic!).

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  8. the first one looks fabulous on you. really. and i think strapless looks great on you and it's totally slimming. sometimes trying to cover things up just makes something that's not a problem in the first place look like a problem. kwim? go strapless- particularly stunning since you'll be getting married on the beach. also, will you do a veil?

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  9. No 2 is lovely. I know what you mean about arms. I don't do arms either. But as the post above says, sometimes trying to cover the issue makes it look worse than what you think it is. Your arms are great. And you should sooo go strapless.
    I am also v interested in the back up dress. You know you have to email "us not going to the doo" people now the pics!
    Has anyone who has been with you been in tears? That can do it. I am not a dress person and even when I got mine I grew to love it...hmmm same as husband! But my mum cried.

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  10. Any chance that you're a size 8-ish? I got married last year in a ridiculously over-priced dress (I wanted to buy a $200 dress from Ann Taylor or JCrew, and got nixed by my dad, who got more wish fulfillment out of That Day than I), which now is taking up valuable space in our tiny closet. If you want to borrow it, you're welcome to do so if you don't mind dry-cleaning it before and after you use it.

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  11. Warning: it is a strapless dress, which I also thought at first would be out of the question for me because I have a terrible upper body (saggy arms and breasts), but the dress did wonders for my torso -- just pushed everything up and held with there with no need for a bra -- and arms are the easiest part of the body to "fix" because they're very responsive to weight training. If you're not getting married until April, just commit to weight training on your arms for 30 minutes every other day and you will look like a movie star. (I had the willpower to train twice a week and looked tolerable, but I started from a much worse place than you.)

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